My Favorite Memory from Childhood: Meghan
What is your best memory from childhood? Really take a minute to think about it. A place? A time with a sibling? Maybe a sports team you were on or a family vacation? Perhaps a school year you loved with a great teacher and all of your favorite friends in your class? Really think about it. Maybe you come up with a handful of memories and that’s okay. The exercise itself is good for our hearts and I hope it brings a feeling of warmth and openness to you with the memories that come to mind. When I think of my childhood, let’s say from the ages of five to thirteen, my best memory is actually a person - Meghan - and the memory is in a feeling of nostalgia that is difficult to express in written words. Just even saying her name in my head brings me great warmth. Meghan.
Meghan grew up across a hill and culdesac away from me. We went to school together, played soccer together, played a little softball together and had a variety of unique hobbies that we shared together - collecting napkins, making stationary and playing office. Her phone number was 894-1172 (remember when we could dial with seven digits!) and I called her at least a handful of times each day, her mom was my piano teacher, she had a basement full of Barbie dolls, Barbie furniture and Barbie clothes, she had a big TV in her family room that we could see from the kitchen table where we ate Fruity Pebbles and her dad had a home office that he worked from selling pacemakers. The concept of working from home was a bit different then and I thought it was amazing that he had his very own office in the house. He even had a pager.
I would sleep over at Meghan’s every chance I had. What came with a sleepover at her house was a ride over by my dad followed by three or four trips back n forth to the car to gather all the stuff I packed - the napkins, Barbies, My Little Ponies, Cabbage Patch dolls, soccer balls, Pound Puppies, Garbage Pail cards, tapes and cassette players and whatever else we were interested in at that time…it all went with us for the sleepovers. Back n forth from house to house. Sometimes countless times in one day.
Bike rides, up and down the street. She was with me when I fell off my bike coming down the big hill when I needed to go get stitches. We rode our ten speeds to Dairy Queen - 3 miles away! We climbed trees, played with their cats (Peter Pan was my favorite) and went to the park each day to practice soccer. We made up games with the other neighbors, ran through sprinklers, hosted garage sales and wandered around aimlessly just for the heck of it.
There was no solid good neighborhood memory that didn’t include Meghan. My memories of childhood are synonymous with her. Tonight I was reading through an autobiography I created in 5th grade and nearly each page mentioned her. Our soccer team, our napkin collection, who’s house do you like going to, who are your favorite people - all of these included Meghan.
As we grew up - and transitioned to junior high and high school - naturally the friendship changed. We may have not been the constant sidekicks we were in elementary school but we were friends and also teammates. How many people can say they have won a National Championship with their first childhood friend? Not many. I mean what a gift it is to go from juggling soccer balls in our yards to winning a USA National Championship for soccer at the age of 16. And then the continued gift of playing against one another at college where we always made time for conversations and catching up after those games.
Matching Halloween costumes. Playing The Piano Man on her piano, prank calls, watching the movie Vacation, making blueberry muffin batter and eating it straight from the bowl, stuffing dandelions in our pockets on the way to school, sneaking clothes from our sisters’ closets. Calling the radio station to request songs. Watching Friday Night Videos. Playing Candyland and Atari. Edie Murphy: Raw. All memories with Meghan.
Cancer can’t take any of that away.
I never wanted to leave Meghan’s house. When I was little, I wanted us to play forever. When I slept over, I would wake up far earlier than anyone in her house. Sometimes I’d just sit there for a couple hours waiting for her. I could have just as easily walked home but it was a worthwhile wait. I couldn’t wait to play with my best friend.
I am writing this on a snowy night at my house in Colorado on my couch. Behind me is my daughter, Holland, and she is the same age - 11- that I was at in the height of my childhood friendship with Meghan. In a very different time with communication than it was in the mid 80s, Holland just finished a FaceTime with her best friend, Jimmy. He lives up the street from us and they have been the best of friends since pre-school. School, swim team, neighborhood games, skiing, they do it all together. And, each time I drop Holland at his house, I think of Meghan. Every single time. Grateful for our memories and also grateful to seeing my daughter have a childhood best friend. A reliable and constant playmate.
I am also writing this the day after learning that Meghan is transitioning to home hospice care. Appendix cancer. For the last many years Meghan has been living with this cancer, bravely battling it and doing it with this positive spirit and bright smile that is beyond inspiring to me. It’s plain baffling. Even on Christmas Day from her hospital room with her husband and son next to her, there she is with this beautiful smile. It’s so humbling. I learned so many things with her growing up. Now close to 40 years later, here she is teaching me about grace.
Meghan is at home with her family right now. Yesterday. she wrote on her CaringBridge page that: “We are not giving up the fight, we are changing the fight.” With this in mind, I am sending every ounce of love, courage, strength, peace, hope - and a set of boxing gloves - to her, Jeff and Zach into their home as they enter this phase. Sometimes the words “There is no place like home” have such significant meaning.
I wrote this to share about my childhood best friend. My first true playmate. My favorite memory from childhood: Meghan. What a gift it is to be able to call your best friend and say: “Do you want to play?”. I hope some of you have similar memories. And, if you do, I encourage you breathe in at that goodness and cherish it.
To Meghan - Make New Friends But Keep the Old. One is Silver. The other, Gold. You are my golden friend. Thank for so much.
